Saturday, 20 October 2012

November 20th, 2007



"I never write anything personal, but today felt like writing about something very close to my  heart"

It's almost 5 years now, but there are days i miss her more than ever and today it feels like it was just yesterday when she was taken away from me. 

As hard as it is sometimes i have made peace with her passing, though there were days when i was invaded by my teenage days nothing she said made any sense, today i know she meant well and when ever i am meters away from losing my mind i always hear her voice whispering softly inside my head. She was the only person who listened attentively even when i did not make sense and pretended like she understood all maybe she did, the only person who tolerated my twisted paths

There can never be any label, identification or success that can ever replace her laughter, beautiful smile, heart ever so caring. It's amazing how fast the years go by but as each year pass i think again of her, more than a mother to me she was a friend, a freedom fighter, a heroine, a person i found easy to confide in. There were times back in the years of struggle she would bravely go about with the things of politics and would get so afraid for her, but she never feared anything, my mother was a valiant, she was a worrier perhaps i took this madness after her (chuckles) On her dying bed she still managed to smile covering the pain, because she never wanted us to lose focus in the dreams we had, I wish she had lived at least up to this far. But i am not worried for i know each day that goes by she is watching and smiling over me.

 sometimes i wonder if there would ever be any price too high, any sacrifice too great for one more moment, one more breath, one more warmth touch. I grasp desperately and sense the closeness, the one just at the fingertips of my heart and mind. Yet only to realize again and again that there is no one she is gone and i am less, may her soul rest in perfect peace " I miss you Mnguni"






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